In our last article we discussed belief systems and what impact they can have on your life. Now it is time to dissolve them. First you have to recognize your negative beliefs and by asking the right questions and questioning your behaviours. This is how:

  1. Find the source of cognitive and emotional dissonances: Ask yourself when in your life do you feel stressed? What would you like to change? In what areas do you want to be different, to act differently? How do you want to feel different? And what is preventing you from taking the appropriate steps?
  2. Analyze situations: In uncomfortable situations, don’t look for someone to blame, but seek your part in it. Especially when you experience similar situations with different people, this could be an indication of a certain belief system.
  3. Ask for permission to change your beliefs: Some beliefs are simply adopted from someone else. These beliefs are based on loyalty to others and can only be resolved with their “permission”. Ask this person for permission to change your behaviour and feelings – you’ll feel better.

How is it possible to dissolve my negative beliefs?

When you’ve uncovered some negative beliefs, you should change them right away. Here are three options that are very powerful when used together.

Strategy

1. Develop a new strategy

Belief systems are strategies that have lost their positive function. But we can replace them with a new strategy with a positive function. We need to “implant” the strategy on all four levels of our belief system.

  • In our subconscious: Think about which new belief system you want to replace your old one. For example: “I have to adapt to the others” could become “I am allowed to be what I am”.
  • In our emotions: Feel what your new belief makes you feel. Example: Instead of having the emotion “fear of rejection” like your old belief, your new belief system will make you feel better and you are more able to trust in yourself.
  • In our thinking: How will the new feeling of love and trust in yourself change the way you think? Example: Instead of downgrading yourself and wanting to change yourself, your thinking will be loving and encourage you to be who you are.
  • In our behaviour and the resulting situations: How will this change your behaviour? Example: The next time you want to say “no”, you will. Then you no longer have to bend over backwards or make yourself small.
Let go and be grateful

2. Be grateful and let it go

Our belief systems are always “meant” in a positive way, even if they limit us. In order to lose it, it is important that we know this and that our belief system is heard.

  • Feeling and confusing: Consciously remember your old beliefs and the feeling belonging to them. Thank them for distinguishing and describing you.
  • Farewell: Tell your belief that you will go on without it from now on because you have other, more effective strategies to protect yourself. You can stand up for yourself and no longer agree with your belief. Ask it to go away.
  • Letting go: Feel and imagine how your belief system is your system. To overcome the effect of letting go, you could perform various methods like writing your beliefs on a piece of paper and burning them.
Experience the future now

3. Experience your future at this moment in time

Our reality is created from within (believe, feel, think). So in order to change our reality, we have to change our insides. This means that in order to change our feelings and thoughts in the future, we must also change it here and now. Now that you know exactly how you will feel, think and act with your new belief system. Make this experience happen right now. For example: with a meditation in which you imagine exactly how different situations will develop with your new belief. What will you feel, think and do? Experience your future here and now. 

Dissolving limiting beliefs takes time and is a constant process of reflection and transformation. This shows how valuable this process is. With every step we get to know ourselves a little better. We learn to love and respect each other more and to create our lives in a better way instead of adapting to our lives and bending over backwards all the time. This will improve our relationship with ourselves. Let’s face it, we’re going to spend the rest of our lives with ourselves, wouldn’t it be nice if we could do that in harmony and love?

About the Author: 

Sophia Thora, Psychological Advisor

Sophia Thora

I am a Munich based Psychological Advisor and Yoga teacher. After my psychology studies and various study courses in stress management and neuro-linguistic programming I went to India to learn how to teach yoga. This  was the beginning of a long journey into yoga and my work as a yoga teacher, mental coach and founder of Kale & Cake. It’s my passion to find ways to a happy, balanced, and healthy life and to show others what inspires me. I am constantly exploring new approaches and developing myself, because I believe that the best teacher never stops being a student. I am happy about everyone with whom I can share my experiences and I love to support others in finding their balance and happiness. 


Download the Mindshine app (iOS or Android) for more mindfulness and happiness exercises that help you find out what you believe and who you are.

Check out how the first part about Belief Systems, or how to turn positive stress into personal growth.